1-800-Mr. Errand Guy

I got a chuckle tonight as I wandered through The Hunters Wife’s blog.  Jody did a little reliving of her single days when she needed help she would just call 1-800- Mr. fix-it guy or whatever.  I guess it was especially funny to me because of what happened to me last fall while elk hunting.

It was one of those hot fall days where we hiked into the hills before day light and hunt all day in the heat and bugs and the domestic cows having moved into the area so the elk had moved out.  But being the bull headed creatures we are we keep at it all day till the sun has moved on to the other side of the earth.  We stumble down to our pickup which is parked on a dead-end skid road which is six  miles from an approved seasonal road and 17 miles from a paved road, and as I drag my tired body in behind the steering wheel I see a business card stuck under my windshield wiper.  Who in the world found us way back in here and who would think to leave his business card?  What kind of business is he in that he would think I would ever want to call him? Enough questions came to mind that I forced the old tired body back out of the pickup so I could reach the card under the wiper.  There it was in real life.  MR. ERRAND GUY – “No errand is to great or to small – just call 1-800-xxx-xxxx.” 

When I get tired and a little frustrated I’ll admit to becoming a wee bit, I think you’d call it sarcastic or cutting or maybe even sardonic.  Anyway this gave me some ammo for the topic of conversation for all 60 miles home.  Sue had to listen to the mostly one sided conversation so could actually tell you how it went better then I, cause most talkers don’t listen to themselves most of the time.

-OK, where was this guy several years ago when I was still trying to turn an elk, that had fallen in a root wad hole,  into meat, and this was at 1:00 in the morning.

-Where was this guy when after packing 11 miles into camp through 20″ of snow, we find the snow had collapsed out tent, and this was about 30 minutes before dark.

-Where was this guy when we could figure no way to pack a wood stove on a horse so I ended up packing that monstrosity on my back for one and a half miles into camp. 

-Where was this guy when I stood eye to eye with a  she bear with two cubs at 17 yards, and nothing but bow and arrow between me and her temperament.

-Where was this guy the time I drug myself out of a canyon in a dark I’ve never seen before or since.  I actually was running into trees.  Climbing by Braille.

-Where was he the day Snowflake the donkey refused to pack our wall tent 12 miles into camp, so my brother in law and I took turns.

On and on it went.  The poor guy was getting blamed for a lot of things he was totally innocent about.  I guess if I’m going to give a guy a hard time for things in the past he never knew about, I should have at least kept his number and give him a chance in the future, but I didn’t.  I mean if you find a fall guy, you sure don’t want to let him up.

 Hey Mr. Errand Guy – got a little errand for you!